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Another story
"Now be a good girl,"she said, as she fastened the diaper as securely as she could around my bottom, "Daddy and I are going to the Jamiesons and we'll be back in about four hours. I don't know where that brother of yours is. He said he'd be back before we left in case you had to go to the bathroom or needed a glass of water or anything. Well, dear, if you have to go, just use the diaper."
Great. Eleven years old and she puts a diaper on me. And my Winnie-the-Pooh t-shirt.
"Just be careful and don't roll off the bunk. I don't want to pick up my little girl off the cottage floor again. Now you're sure you don't want me to prop you up in a chair in front of the TV?"
"No, Mommie, I'll be fine. I'll just lie here and listen to the birds and watch the sailboats on the bay. Have a good time at the Jamiesons."
I'd been lying on that bunk every summer that I could remember, listening to the birds and watching the boats on the bay, and watching everybody else have a good time out on the lawn.
I wanted so much to be able to go out and play with the neighbor kids. They were having so much fun running and laughing. All I could do was twist my little body around on the bed, and wonder why they all had arms and legs, and I didn't. Mom just told me that I was "special", and put a ribbon in my hair. So there I lay, summer after summer in some little baby outfit that Mom had made for me, staring out the window from my bed-prison.
Mom or Dad would always bring me food and feed me, and take me to the bathroom, and then "tuck me in". Sometimes I would wriggle down to the footboard of my bed, work myself up to a pretty much standing position and look across at myself in the mirror above the bureau. I tried to imagine what I would look like with arms and legs. I used to close my eyes and pretend that I could feel my arms and legs moving, and hands and feet touching things. Sometimes at night I even dreamed that I could run and play like the other kids. Then I would wake up, feeling worse than ever. I felt strong and healthy, I just didn't have any arms or legs. I never felt crippled or anything like that. Everything I had worked just fine. I even learned to do a lot of neat things with my mouth and could even curl up almost in a ball and touch my bottom with my chin. I tried to plan out how to do things for myself, even if my folks liked to think of me as their little baby. Someday, I thought, with a lot of practice, I was going to be able to do things like everyone else.
This year, this summer, when we came to the cottage, I had determined that I was twelve years old, almost a young woman now, and I was really tired of being treated like an infant.
"OK,"I thought, "so I don't have any arms, and I don't have any legs, but that is no reason to be treated like some totally useless blob."
First on the list was going to the bathroom by myself. No arms and no legs or whatever, I was somehow going to get down off that bunk and get to the bathroom and back all by myself. I mean, I'm almost a grown-up, right? It's time I should at least be able to have some personal privacy. Anyhow, that would be the first thing then, after that, maybe even tomorrow, I would figure out how to get down the stairs for breakfast.
"Are they gone?"hissed Billy, my ten-year old brother and partner in this adventure, peeking out of the closet. Actually Billy was pretty much a little pest a lot of the time, but when it came to figuring out how to do things, he was really great.
"Yep, they just pulled out."
"So what's the plan?"
"You keep a lookout, OK? I'm going to wiggle around on my tummy, and slide down alongside the bunk."
"Yeah, and then what?"
"The plan is to go along the wall, you know, sort of lean against it and I think I can swivel my bottom to sort of walk along the wall, OK?"
"I bet you fall over!"
"If I do you can tip me up again, OK?"
"Go for it!"
I remember writhing and wriggling until I had my bottom hung out over the side of the bunk, and having a big mouthful of covers.
"What about the diaper?"Billy asked. "Are you going to try to walk with that thing on?"
"Oh, right,"I mumbled through the blankets.
More writhing and wriggling and I had extricated my bottom from the plastic-covered covering. I remember how good it felt to be free of the diaper. Sort of a big step toward my independence.
"Do you really have to go, or are you just pretending?"
"Billy!"
"No, I mean, the way you were squeezin' your stuff together, I thought maybe..."
"Billy, just shut up, OK?"
"All right."
Another session of rearranging myself, and I began the slide down the side of the bunk, holding the covers in my mouth, and digging my chin into the mattress.
"Ooch. oooch,"I thought "Gotta remember to make sure that they're are some covers over the edge of the mattress when my chest goes past."
Then I lost my grip on the bed. I remember falling. It was only a couple of inches, but the t-shirt was up over my head, and I couldn't tell.
"Ouch."
"What?"
"Nothing. Get this T-shirt off me, OK? It just hurt a little when I hit the floor. I'll have to land more to my rear when I get up in the mornings."
"You really going to get up just like everybody else?"
"Of course, stupid. Don't you think it's about time?"
"Yup. Sure. And hey, you're standing up!"
"Said I could! As long as I can lean against something, no problem! Now for the tricky part."
I remember leaning against the bed, balancing on one hip, and swivelling my bottom around facing the bedroom door. Then I shifted my weight across to where there might have been the other leg, but there wasn't, and rocked across to that side. So far, so good. Slowly I began the procedure that I had rehearsed in my young mind so many times, over and over. Not really walking. At best you could call it sort of a slushy waddle, keeping my balance against the wood-panelled walls of the bedroom, then through the door to the hall.
"Good goin', Sis!"Billy called out.
"Keep it down, Bill, OK?"
"OK. I'm gonna take a look out the back. I'll be right back."
He disappeared down the stairs. The next thing I remember was the plaited rug that lay between me and the bathroom. I got on it OK, but when I did my swivel, the rug bunched up and slid to the side, dumping me on the hall floor. So there I was, buck naked, flopping around on the floor like a fish out of water.
I had a panic attack, thinking that my folks might have forgotten something and come back and see me like that. I really wanted to get up by myself, but I hadn't learned how to do it the way I do now. Somehow I remember working my way over to the wall and inching the back of my head then shoulders and back up the wall, pushing with my bottom along the floor with all my might, and slipping every which way. I remember somehow getting upright again, and just resting there in the hall sweating up a storm, waiting for Billy to come back.
"The coast is still clear,"Billy whispered hoarsely as he climbed the pine stairs.
I began the process again, and this time made it to the bathroom door. Across the little room stood the porcelain throne.
"OK, kiddo, here's where I'm on my own,"I told my brother. That's what this is all about, right? Got to do it alone."
I worked my way across the door jamb, and got behind the door.
"Billy, keep around, OK ? I probably will need some help getting this door open again."
"OK, no problem."
I shuffled my way around behind the door and got it closed. I worked my way along the tub, and climbed, if you could say that, on to the scales that sat beside the toilet. I got the lid up, and eventually managed to get sprawled across the bowl. It was pretty awkward as I think back about it now, but it was a real victory for an eleven-going-on-twelve year old kid. Still, I managed to do what I had set out to do, and tangled up some toilet paper with my moist bottom, curled around and finished the job. Thrilled with the victory, I didn't mind the pain of falling unceremoniously onto the bathroom floor as the commode was flushing.
"OK, Billy, you can open the door!"
No answer.
"Billy?"
Still no answer. Oh great. So I wiggled and waggled across the floor on my tummy, and against the wood-panelled wall slowly, painfully inched myself back up to an upright position. Darn him.
"Billy!!!"
"Shoosh, Sis, the whole neighborhood'l hear you!"
"Where were you?"
"Looking through the knothole, over there. I could see the whole thing. You did great!"
"What?"
"No kidding. I'm really proud of you!"
Somehow his pride and innocence made me feel a little less furious. In fact, that moment got us started on a real partnership.
Alice: The Next Morning
"C'mon, wake up,"she was saying in my ear. The rain was still pouring down outside the hunting cabin where we had taken refuge from the storm the night before.
Aly was still wrapped in my arms, her limbless body wiggling and poking at me to bring me to consciousness.
"C'mon, wake up. I need to...is there a bathroom here?"
Actually, there wasn't. There was only an antique hand pump that splashed into a basin in the tiny kitchen area. The hunting cabin belonged to some friends of my father, and they kept it totally rustic. The only other facility was a small wooden "one-seater"that was a good walk away from the cabin, now through pouring rain.
"No, there isn't,"I said groggily, beginning to experience the same need as Alice.
"What are we going to do?"she asked me.
"I guess the porch is about the only option."
"What, go off the side?"
"Mm. The outhouse is way over in the woods and it's still really pouring."
"That'd be OK for you, smarty-pants boy,"Aly said, "but y'know, girls and girls without legs in particular, are going to have just a wee bit of a problem with that!"
"Do you have any better ideas?"I asked sitting up now and helping Aly to an upright position. She made the movements of a person stretching. A naked person with no arms or legs, stretching. Yawning, she lifted her beautiful breasts quite high, then let them down gain. They bobbed merrily.
"Not really. I guess if can go off the end of a log like I did coming up here, I can manage off a porch. Can you give me a lift?"
I gathered Aly in my arms and started for the front door. He hair was tousled and there was still a lot of sleep in her eyes, but she was still one of the most beautiful girls I had ever met, let alone spent the night with.
"Oh my gosh, don't drop me,"she chirped as I took one hand away from her bottom to open the door.
"I'll be careful,"I said. The door came open just as a gust of wind splattered water onto the porch, and she shivered in my arms.
"Wait,"she said, "before you put me down. The rain is coming down all over the edge of the porch, and I don't know about you, naked boy person, but I'm going to get soaked. I mean, I don't have hardly any control over where it goes, so my front has to be out past the edge to get a clear shot. This is rediculous. I'm going to get just totally soaked!"
"I could just hold you up while you go,"I said. This was beginning to be a very odd morning.
"Sure, but that still doesn't take care of my direction problem. Maybe the extra elevation...Oh, hell, let's try it,"Aly said with determination, "just try to keep me out of the rain."
I carried her shivering limbless torso as close to the edge of the porch as I could, without getting us both drenched and lifted her up a bit.
"How's this?"
"Move your right hand so I don't...or better yet, listen. This is going to seem pretty weird, but can you spread my...my...you know...toes, and sort of point me over the railing?"
I did as I was asked. Alice wriggled just a little, and successfully sent a long strong stream over the railing into the bushes below.
A huge smile spread across her face as she turned to me.
"Fantastic. Talk about relief!"
We both laughed as I lowered her bare bottom onto the rustic deck of the porch.
"Now I'm all set for winter. You can help me write my name in the snow!"she chortled.
Without further delay I stepped back to the edge of the porch and prepared to follow suit.
"Hey, wait,"Aly said, "I can't see."
"What?"
"I want to watch. I've never seen just how you do it."
Good grief, I thought. Aly wiggled and swiveled a few feet to one side and said,
"Do you mind? I mean, I just thought..."
"Well, no,"I flustered, "I mean under the circumstances, that would be only fair, right?"Even with as much time as I had spent with Aly, and as close as we had become,
I was, well, embarrassed. Further, my excitement was quite evident.
"Can you make it bigger and smaller whenever you want? Or how do you do that, exactly?"Aly asked, in a curiously innocent voice.
"First things first,"I said, as I releved myself from the edge of the porch.
"Do you have to hold it to point it, or can you make it aim all by itself?"
"If I had that kind of control,"I continued, "I'd probably be in a sideshow or something. Unfortunately, it pretty well has a mind of its own. Right now it appears that it wants to sleep"
"Oh."
"There are a few things I can do that'll wake it up, though. Putting it to sleep is a lot harder. I think it must like you a lot, though, Aly. Seems to be awake a lot when you're around."
"Must be like my nips,"Aly said. "I can make 'em hard. You know, really stick out,
but then they want to stay that way unless I need them to stay hard, then they just sort of, like you said, go to sleep. Frustrating sometimes."
"That's it, exactly, I said, lifting her up and carrying her back to the daybed.
"OK,"she said, "You solved that problem for us, now it's my turn."
"Your turn?"
"Right. It's breakfast time, right?"
"Well yes, but..."
"And I'm hungry, aren't you?"
"Yes."
"Do they keep anything here to eat?"
"I don't know. There's a gas stove, if they filled the tank, and you have to pump water. Let me see what there is."
"Nope, my turn, remember? Besides, I feel like exploring."
With that, Aly slipped down off the daybed, and once she had her balance, started toward the back of the cabin. It was incredible to realize that she could actually move about without even a trace of arms or legs. Yet there she was, upright, on the rough floor of the cabin, swinging her chest left and right, as if her breasts were her arms, rocking on her tapering hips from one side to the other, a few inches of progress with each move. In a few minutes she was out of sight down the hall.
"Ouchy ooch!"she called out suddenly. "The floor back here is really rough on the old bottom! OK, I found the kitchen."
"I'm on my way..."I started to say, getting on my feet.
"No! Forget it. Go back to sleep or something. I want to figure this out by myself!"
For the next fifteen minutes I could hear noises coming from the primative kitchen. Drawers opened, metal objects clattered on the floor, something was moved across the floor. Probably the old chair that sat out there. Small noises, chirps and growls from Alice.
"Oh dammit! You guys are so useless! OK, I give up. Hey!! You wanna help a little?"
I pulled on my shorts and stepped over to the kitchen. Aly had somehow gotten up on the old chair, next to the sink, and had located a bowl and some powdered milk, but had managed to spill much of the powdered milk onto the counter top while trying to get it into the bowl.
"I should be able to pick up a box and pour it, right? No way. I mean, see what happened!"
Aly hunched over and continued her futile attempts to grasp the box between her breasts.
"You'd think with all the exercises and stuff I've been doing you'd think I could at least pick up a stupid box of powdered milk without spilling it all over the place! I mean, if I can lift a beer can with my boobies, why not this thing? OK, one more time."
Finally she lifted the container and with extraordinary effort got the remaining contents into a bowl.
"Yahoo!!"she cheered. She held both of her breasts as high as she could for my approval. "See, I can, I can! they're not totally useless, right?"
I was hard pressed to answer. There just weren't the right words. How do you tell somebody like Aly just how wonderful she is?
"No, Aly, you're pretty neat,"was what I said. "What do you want me to do to help?"
"See, up on that next shelf? There's some pancake mix. I tried to reach it, but even standing on tiptoe I couldn't get my mouth on it to pull it down."
"Tiptoe?"
"Yeah, like this,"she said, and tipped her pelvis so that her little body lifted slightly, balanced precariously on the pubic bone, her body swaying in an effort to maintain her balance.
"I can't stay up very long, but I can reach a little higher that way,"she explained, settling her weight onto one side of her pelvis.
"Anyhow, if you could get the mix and that oil down for me, and do you know how to get water from that thing?"
She pointed one very erect nipple at the old fashioned cast-iron hand pump beside the sink.
"I'm not sure,"I said, giving the handle a few tries.
"I did that,"she said, "no luck."
"Probably needs priming or something. Let me get some water outside. Is there a little bowl or something?"
Aly turned and held a small crockery bowl out to me.
"Here, Galahad, will this do?"
"Worth a try. Be right back."
I stepped out onto the porch and held the bowl under the eaves at a place where the water was coming down in a gentle stream. The rain was less of a torrent now, more gentle, and a few birds were making noises like they thought it would stop soon.
"Here, Aly, let me try this."I poured a splash of water into the cup at the top of the pump and worked the handle. Something happened because the handle got harder to push, but still no water. I tried priming it again, and this time water came forth after a few strokes.
"Cool,"Aly exclaimed. "OK, so I've got the pancake mix and powdered milk. Here take this cup,"she said, poking a nipple through the handle of a coffee mug and steadying it with the other, "and put one and a half cups into the mixture. Then just a little of this cooking oil."
I continued to follow her instructions while she stirred the mixture with a large wooden spoon held under her chin. An old cast iron grill was brought up to the right temperature, and in ten minutes we sat down to breakfast at the rustic table in the front room.
"I hardly expected you to be a good cook,"I said, meaning to compliment her.
"Why not?"
"Well, I mean it's fantastic that you can do as much as you can..."
"Look,"she said, "just because I was born with a circus freak body doesn't mean that I'm not a perfectly normal person otherwise. There are lots of things that I like to do just like any other girl in the world. I like to shop, I like to talk on the phone with my friends, I like movies, and I'd probably like to dance, too. So I can cook. Big deal."
I ate silently for a while.
I watched Aly as she took the handle of a fork in her teeth, cut a mouthful of pancakes from her stack and lowering the handle of the fork over the edge of the plate, leaned foreward and lowered one breast on the handle, tipping the fork up to her mouth. The process took no longer than the way I was eating.
"I'm sorry,"she said between bites, "It's not your fault. It's just that I get so bloody exasperated at everyone assuming that just because I don't have arms and legs, or even shoulders, or nice sexy hips, that I'm not a real human being. I am. I really am. I wanted to show you that. That's all."
We finished the pancakes quietly. The rain had stopped and little splashes of sunlight touched the cabin windows.
"Is it OK if I do the dishes?"I asked with a smile.
Aly's face brightened. She had made her point, and was now ready to move on.
"Sure. Hey, remember that first day you came to our cabin, and I said I had been doing the dishes?"
"Yep. You said you weren't too good at it, because it was hard to hold soapy dishes."
"Exactly. Since I don't seem to have grown any arms or anything in the meantime, I'd be honored if you'd take care of that little chore!"
I washed and Aly dried. Everything was restored to it's place as best we could remember. We gathered ourselves together and got ready to resume our trek back down the mountain. Aly and I were sitting on the daybed while I rearranged a few things in my pack, when I felt the touch of a warm soft nipple on my arm. I turned to Aly.
"Something?"I asked.
There was the tinyest hint of moisture in the corners of her eyes.
"Everything,"she said quietly.
We didn't leave the cabin right away. Not for another two hours. When we got down to the parking lot, my old car was there waiting.
On the drive back, Aly had kept her top off, and was making full use of her special abilities. She seemed to take particular pleasure in 'pointing out' things along the way.
When we came to the her cottage with the green shutters, I carried her to the door.
"Thank you,"she said. "I really enjoyed these two days. I'm sorry if I blew up."
"I enjoyed them, too,"I said. "and what's kind of funny, I'm glad that happened. I mean we're really honest with each other."
"That's very important,"she said.
She reached up to me in her own special way, from the doorstep. I leaned down. We stayed there for a while not saying anything.
"See you soon?"
"Very soon. I'll call. Bye."
"Bye,"she said, waved and headed in. I left the cottage with the green shutters and headed home.
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