Smuggling her out of the office had been something of an exercise in stealth. He had wrapped Karen up entirely in his jacket, hiding her from the rest of the workforce, and the loitered by the doorway of her office room until he was sure that the least amount of people possible would see them. Then he darted past everyone, clutching his boss tight to his chest. He zoomed past a startled Simon who barely had time to register a hello before Fergus was gone, darting into an elevator that by the good grace of God was waiting open for them.

Karen had given him her address; she lived on the other side of town. Normally that would be a pain, but at least it wasn’t rush hour. He had made sure Karen was secured safely in the seat next to him. A terrible part of him had considered buying her a baby seat. An even worse part of him had thought about putting her in the trunk. Probably because she had continued to send him texts even though he was driving.

Don’t drive so fast! You’re a maniac!

“Stop texting me!” said Fergus out loud, thumping his steering wheel in frustration. “Christ!”. He took a long deep breath. Shouting and cursing wasn’t going to do anyone any good; she couldn’t even hear it. He let the buzzing of the phone fade of out into the background, unnoticed, as the torso girl squirmed in her seat. At least with his jacket on she had some of her dignity preserved. He wondered what a cop would think, should one pull up beside Fergus’s car and look through the widow. He hoped that he didn’t find out.

Thankfully, and for once in this rotten period of Fergus’s life, he got lucky. There were no incidents as he made his way smoothly to Karen’s home. She lived in a small, cosy looking building all on her own, as it turned out. There was no garden or lawns save for a hedge that was shared with her neighbour, and there didn’t appear to be any floors above the ground level. Which made sense when Fergus thought about it. He couldn’t really see Karen either making her way up any stairs or mowing any lawns by herself. He pulled up outside and picked up his poor, overworked phone.

“We’re here. Please don’t text while I’m driving thanks”

Thank god. OK, take me inside.

Fergus got out and soon had Karen cradled in his arms once more. He made his way to the porch. A thought occurred.

“Do you have a key?” he texted.

I sent Eva a message. She’s left a key under the mat.

Fergus looked. There was indeed a small key left there. He picked it up. Another thought occurred, and he fumbled for his phone, having to juggle it along with Karen and the key.

“Why didn’t you just get Eva to run you home?!”

Because I like Eva, and you were right there anyway. It’s your fault I had to come home anyway, you dolt!

Taking some deep breaths, Fergus unlocked the front door and carried his charge inside. He wandered into the living room and looked around, surprised. There was barely any decorations- the walls were painted white, and there were no mirrors, posters, paintings or anything else. It made sense when he started to think about it, of course. Someone as practical as Karen had no need for decorations. A part of him wondered if the house would look the same way even if she had a head…

“Where should I take you?”

Upstairs. Get me changed.

Yikes. Well, this had been likely. Fergus was directed via increasingly abrupt texts to his boss’s bedroom. The bed there was far too large for a woman of Karen’s size, which was the one show of indulgence in an otherwise Spartan home. Everything else was extremely clean and orderly looking, no doubt thanks to the careful work of Eva. He placed Karen down gently on her bed. He thought for a bit about how to word his text.

“Do you have pyjamas”

There are comfy shirts in the drawers.

“Which drawer?”

Stop texting and start looking, I’m getting cold

The torso rolled gently around on the bed, trying to get comfortable as the out-of-his-depth office worker found himself rooting through her drawers. Work clothes, casual wear, and of course inevitably a drawer full of underwear. The second to last drawer was filled with oversized shirts- he picked out a black one and brought it over, removing the shirt she had been wearing, and started to pull it over Karen. His phone buzzed.

Too warm with my underwear on. Take those off too.

“Seriously.” He texted back, once the freeze that he’d felt in his chest had dissipated.

Do me. It.

Fergus read the text carefully. What an… interesting slip. He remembered how that worked- her thoughts were being directly translated into messages, right? Could that have just been a little Freudian slip?

What if it wasn’t?

Fergus?

“Ok two seconds.”

He turned Karen over so she was face down, so to speak, then unhooked her bra. His hands trembled as he worked, and in his state of now heightened paranoia about his boss and her thoughts, it seemed as though her torso was squirming at his touch. Where had this come from? He was imagining it, surely. Not Karen, the battle-axe from hell who had spent the last week hating his guts. No, clearly, he just had a dirty mind.

He turned Karen over again and lifted her bra off. Her breasts were now fully exposed, and now that they were free it was apparent how blessed the torso-girl was in that department. Fergus took a few deep breaths and tried to stay {i]professional , averting his eyes, only to be met with her white cotton panties. He slipped a finger down the sides and Karen reacted instantly, squirming uncontrollably for several seconds like she’d just been electrocuted. A damp spot had very obviously formed in her panties. Fergus held his fingers there, paralyzed and unsure how to proceed. But he had no choice. He slid the garments off of Karen, and then she was nude. Her slit was clearly glistening as Karen wiggled some more on the bed. She had a finely trimmed cut of blonde pubic hair- Fergus would only later twig that this meant Karen would have been a blonde with a head. Right now he was a little distracted.

Zombie-like, Fergus slowly reached out a hand… and grabbed the black shirt on the bed. Then he carefully fitted it down over Karen’s shoulders and pulled it over the rest of her, covering up his boss once more, before breathing a sigh of relief. For a moment there, he had to admit there had been a shameful stirring in his pants. Seeing her naked, just a torso, not even a head! Naked and vulnerable in a way he’d never seen a woman before. And with how she had been acting- or at least, how he had started to think she had been acting. That was the thing, Karen was so hard to read that you could project all sorts of things onto her actions. Fergus shook his head, chastising himself for this. At least now he could concentrate. Hopefully she’d be back to her usual self.

His phone went off.

That’s it? Really?

What.

“??” he texted back. The torso had stopped wiggling around so much, wrapped up in the oversized black shirt that would have went down to just above Karen’s knees had she still had knees.

You dense motherfucker. You absolute clueless gibbon.

This string of insults actually went on longer- Fergus had to interrupt her mid-flow, reeling from this unexpected turn. He was starting to regret wishing that Karen would go back to her old self now.

“What did I do?”

How much more obvious do I have to be you blithering idiot?! Do I have to spell it out for you? Because I will.

“Karen I’m sorry I don’t understand”

F

U

C

K

M

E

Fergus got the message around about the letter C, and waited for Karen to finish before responding with his own spelling contest entry.

“W. A. T.” He watched as the torso in front of him tried to wiggle in his direction. Somehow it looked angry, the wiggles full of purpose as she inched towards where she imagined her assistant was standing. The constant vibrations of the phone in his hand only made her seem angrier.

What, you think that coffee spill was an accident? You dolt. I’ve been trying to get your attention since day one. Most guys would have picked up on it, but you’re just a precious cinnamon roll who can’t take a hint.

“You mean that was you flirting? Lol.”

Don’t lol at me, Fergus! The torso, “crawling” on her stomach, had a few seconds of squirming, which Fergus interpreted as a sort of tantrum. I can’t just… flirt with a guy? Not just cause I’m your boss. You know what I mean. It’s hard. You couldn’t understand. Don’t say you do. You don’t.

It was hard to argue with, not when his previously ice-cold boss was being so sincere with him. He picked her up, gently, and gave Karen a hug. There was a risk of being patronising here, but he felt instinctively this was the right call for now. He held her there. The texts stopped, leaving the two with a moment of calm. He felt her naked chest rising and falling against his own, so close that he could feel her heart beat. When it slowed down into a calm rythmn, he held her lightweight body with one arm and picked up the phone with the other, wondering what to say given what her stated intentions had been. He’d never read a text from Karen the same way again now.

“You OK?”

I feel stupid. Urgh. Sorry. I’m a bit pent up.

“It’s OK.”

It’s not like I ask Eva to get me off or anything. I’m kinda. I need. I’d be grateful.

Fergus tapped his finger on the side of the phone thoughtfully. This had escalated rather quickly, in a way he had somehow not seen coming when she had asked him to take her home. Maybe he really was an idiot.

“You sure?”

If this is making you uncomfortable, I understand. I’m your boss, I know. Awkwaaaard.

“Do you promise not to send very angry texts if we do this.”

I’ll send the sweetest and cuddliest texts ever if you just hurry up and fuck me already.

There wasn’t really a text he could think of that didn’t sound lame in response to that. So Fergus didn’t bother. He just dropped the phone onto the floor, and then Karen onto the bed, letting her tiny form drop out of the shirt before throwing it away. He could see her shiver in anticipation as he undressed. Fergus had never been someone with a lot of confidence in his body, but that didn’t matter so much right now. In a way it was rather liberating.

When he was as naked as his boss (a sentence that would normally have sent him screaming out of a nearby window) Fergus knelt down next to the bed, so that his face was more or less level with Karen. He reached his hands out and let them travel around her body- his fingers traced themselves around her firm sides and front, moving over her chest freely. Karen squirmed helplessly. The phone started to vibrate, but for now Fergus wasn’t going to take any orders from Karen. He grabbed her suddenly and pulled her towards the edge of the bed, his face inches away from her slit, and helped himself to a taste.

The quintuple amputee reacted as much as was possible for someone with no arms, legs or head, all her available muscles contacting as Fergus lapped at her fold. His hands squeezed and spread the cheeks of her butt as he took his time, letting his tongue linger on certain spots, taking breaks between each lick. Occasionally Fergus would pull his face back and bring his fingers up to her labia, spreading Karen’s flower and admiring the view. She looked ready.

The assistant stood up, taking Karen with him. He was already hard, but he rubbed her body against himself for a little bit, both to get himself 100% erect and to let his boss know what was in store for her. He could hear his phone going like crazy, but he stood firm in denying her contact for now. When he felt the time was right, Fergus hoisted Karen into the air and held her there for a few seconds, before lowering her down onto his cock.

She slipped over his member and immediately he could feel her vaginal muscles clamp down on him, squeezing him for all she was worth. Fergus still had to do most of the work here; it was honestly more like a very advanced form of jerking off, pulling the torso up and then pushing her back down again over and over. At least she was light, even with those boobs of her. They jiggled up and down, looking much bigger than they probably were due to Karen’s unique body-shape. He reached his arms out and held the torso by her tits, supporting her body weight with his dick and the hands around her boobs.

“Hmph,” he groaned, feeling her sink deeper onto him. It occurred to him that Karen was deaf, and he took the opportunity to indulge in some dirty talk. “You feel great around my cock. Fuck.” He stopped, embarrassed at himself, before continuing. “I’m using my boss as a sex-toy. Hahaha. My boss is a sex-toy!” He had to stop himself from shouting it, but he had to admit, it felt hot to say that as he rode his boss like the toy he’d said she was.

He blinked. Uh oh, that had felt a little too good. He was close now, and quickly tried to pull out of his boss before he made the torso pregnant. He almost threw her onto the bed, Karen landing on her stomach “facing” Fergus. Thinking quickly, he pushed the button on her collar that opened up her throat, and plunged himself inside. He came quickly, blowing his load directly down into her stomach, practically holding her upside down as he milked himself dry with her. Tired, he collapsed onto the bed, withdrawing himself from his boss and wiping himself clean on her skin. He laid there on top of her for a few minutes.

Eventually he got up and retrieved the phone from the floor. He had some fun reading though the messages he had missed, which were a good thirty or so deep.

“Enjoy yourself, then?”

Yeah : )

“Not too rough I hope.”

Not rough enough. Next time don’t be so cautious.

“Next time?” he texted back, smiling.

Obviously. You’re staying the night, I assume?

Fergus looked down at the naked torso lady on the bed, glistening and red-skinned, as she arched her back and presented herself some more.

“I could do that.”

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